Tag: everyone has a story

[Ask Me About My Period: A Series]

Period.

A taboo subject.

Even amongst groups of women.

Never in front of men (they don’t *want* to know).

And doctors, for the most part, don’t listen.

So, women suffer (if they even realize they are) in silence.

At first, I thought nothing of it. I’ve never been regular. And the longer I went without having a period, the worse it got.

But this time it was… different.

I didn’t know who to talk to.

Mom had been gone for almost a year. I had fired my OBGYN because her bedside manner was atrocious.

I felt lost… alone. Scared.

A friend of mine, in passing, said she had an OB appointment, and I asked her where she went. Tampa. The guy was “great.” I decided to go there.

I left feeling rage.

He didn’t listen, didn’t understand, didn’t care. Despite me trying to explain just how much blood I was losing. Despite my fears and concerns.

“This is what happens when women get old.”

Old? I had never even considered myself old before.

“You just need to get used to it. This can go on for years.”

Get used to it??!! Get used to feeling constantly tired, to feeling ugly and disgusting and gross? To be afraid to leave the house? For years??!!

My insurance allows you to speak to a doctor via video chat and I set up an appointment. This time with a female. And I was picky.

I just wanted someone to hear me…

She was no different. Rude, abrupt. Made me feel silly, stupid. “He should have used the word perimenopause. Maybe then you would have listened to him.”

Perimenopause. The phase before menopause.

A word I had never really heard before. But things made sense. No wonder women are so angry during menopause – they bleed half to death during perimenopause and doctors call them old, tell them there is nothing they can do about it.

I even (half) joked with older ladies I’m friends with about it, saying we should talk about this subject more so that women are more prepared for this stage in life.

I was opening the door… and so many people had a story.

Maybe they were right. Maybe this was normal. Maybe I did just need to get used to it. Maybe.